Chin Wey ™

a simple bring uncountable meaning to someone. the last song, the very last song dedicated to her, before she left us...so long...

牵手

因为爱著你的爱
因为 梦著你的梦
所以悲伤著你的悲伤
幸福著你的幸福

因为路过你的路
因为苦过你的苦
所以快乐著你的快乐
追逐着你的追逐

因为誓言 不敢听
因为承诺不敢信
所以放心著你的沉默
去说服明天的命运

没有风雨躲得过
没有坎坷不必走
所以安心的牵你 的手
不去想该不该回头

也许牵了手的手
前生不一定好走
也许有了伴的路
今生还要更忙碌

所以牵了手的手
来生还要一起走
所 以有了伴的路
没有岁月可回头



to look for the song is kind of mess up...but we ended up found it and the band created the rhythm and all of us sang it out...though the environment getting worst at the end, but at least we able to dedicate to her the very last song...we hope that she able to listen it...

may you rest in peace there...so long...

cousins, you must be strong to face everything happen. my support will always be there for you!!!

today's class started at 1pm and i eventually fall asleep in the class...sigh...probably i cant get well sleep for few days...i am not attached, at all...but just that i was thinking of something, something that makes my life completely change for now...a midnight chat with my friend yesterday somehow enlightens my mind...ya...this is another stage of life, and i have to keep my track on...but did i make something right? getting hooked up its another phase of life where i have to trade my freedom and flexibility with companionship and happiness...but do i able to do that? am i ready to make such sacrifices?

as the days goes on, i feel the emptiness in my heart...siblings and friends are started to get hooked up, leaving myself alone...i feel alone in both worlds...should i still stand on my feet, remain single? there's one here...should i remain with my principle? or i should step out? apparently, i am inspecting in details about it and asking myself should i go for it? or am i escaping myself from being alone?

yes, i admit myself still the naive thoughts, clean cut relationship, though there's in mind, but it seems there's a something blocking my ways. my family dint discuss about this to me, probably they dont want me to get hooked up, in early age, probably? am i ready to jump out from the naive thoughts and face the reality?

it is distracting, totally...and my mind still full of thoughts...hooking up or instead? i have no idea...what i can do now is see the condition, whether we can go into more than what we are now...

ya...recently kinda emoted...for some reasons probably...the beginning of the semester is not that smooth as i think...i predicted something wrong...out of my expectation...i dint expect things to be happen in this way, i think...

being single, or attached? this is the reason why i change my facebook status, for the very first time...i have no idea whether i should accept the fact that i should enter to another stage, the stage where i should have partner? im too afraid to welcome it, is this because i havent play enough? or too much of single life? in previous, i dont think much about it and make me change my status in facebook, but this time is real...i have to start thinking about it...

talking about feelings, i failed...failed how to control myself. im the type who has many feelings at one time...i dont know how to express it...perhaps due to failures happened to me in the past, makes me no confident to face it...in this case, i somehow want to escape from it, rather than facing it...im such a failure in relationship problem...i dont even know which is the best way of expressing myself to her...im in dilemma, totally...

i guess im still in the childhood, where everyone can be friends...no such complicated relationship, couples, and so on...where everyone can always hang out together, but i realised that im still living in the past...in the childhood...im 22 now, i have to face that i have and must leave that as a memory, is no longer applicable now...what am i doing now is just looking for people to complete my childhood memories, not to complete my life now...ya...childhood memories, indeed is freaking for me and wish to delete them by replacing what i have now...im such a dumb, it is not going to happen...

my mind is full of thoughts now, i need to recondition my feelings now, not to treat too well and think like an adult now...i hope i can put more effort on what i like now, the girl perhaps? i have no comment apparently...the urge is not strong, maybe what am i thinking now still like a kid...but i dont want a short-term relationship, i wish...

yet another long time no blogging period, and many causes this. the first, of course no thought in mind, and recently i have a serious gastric pain, resulted me almost a week...and finally im back in action...

first thing i have in mind is treat. food? nope. haha. what i am thinking now is the friendship treat. do i seems treating people too much, more than a friend or buddy should do? did i make something that is too much, annoying others? thinking this makes me creepy, perhaps i shouldnt treat people too good, as this will annoy others, well i guess this is so...

should i treat people well or not? i have no idea...